Why I Love This Episode

Michael and Pablo are status quo shifters!!

I’ve known them for almost 6 years through Integrative Nutrition, and it was so much fun to reconnect with them. I think sooo much about what men need in terms of space to be sensitive, open, and caring and that they must struggle with the things that we women struggle with but can’t be open about that. I’d love to see that change, and Michael and Pablo are doing work to make that shift.

What This Episode is All About

I’ve been thinking a lot about celebrating our similarities and the things that make us all human so today’s show couldn’t have come at a better time. 

I have brothers, who I love so much, and if you’re listening don’t worry – I won’t tell your deepest darkest secrets…and I often wonder what type of pressure they feel in today’s society. 

What it means to “be a man.”

Boys are or historically have been taught not to cry, to bring home the bacon, and to be “manly” — whatever that means. 

They’re supposed to like sports, have deep voices, and do the chores that require heavy lifting. 

I think strides are taken to shift this, but I think taking the time to consider men’s ability to be vulnerable, sensitive, and open about their emotions is really important. 

I found a blog post on the Atlantic about shame and gender and a conversation with Brene Brown…

She told me that “messages of shame are organized around gender.” For women, she said, there are whole constellations of often contradictory expectations that, if not met, are sources of shame. But for men, the overarching message is that any weakness is shameful. And since vulnerability is often perceived as weakness, it is especially risky for men to practice vulnerability.

What Brown also discovered in the course of her research is that, contrary to her early assumptions, men’s shame is not primarily inflicted by other men. Instead, it is the women in their lives who tend to be repelled when men show the chinks in their armor.

This made me sad and want to know what I can do as a woman in supporting men to be open, honest, and real. As michael says in this interview…if you don’t give your man space to share his dreams he’ll never share his fears. 

I met today’s guests at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition – you can listen to the unedited version to hear our little catch up sesh – it was so much fun hearing what they’re up to today.

Michael DeSanti is the owner of Authentic Self Healing LLC, a men’s fulfillment coaching company and he is the co-owner of The Vital Guide, a retreat company for men. He is a Transformational Trainer and the author of “New Man Emerging.” He is committed to inspiring men to live lives of purpose and fulfillment.

Pablo A. Garcia is also a graduate of The Natural Gourmet Institute’s Chef’s Training Program and has coached 3 years with the Joe Cross Reboot programs at Omega Institute. Motivated by his own personal struggles, Pablo transformed his life by studying and understanding what the body and mind need to thrive. He helps clients shift the habits and patterns that hold them back into positive and sustaining ones that better serve them.

Michael & Pablo joined together to form, The Vital Guide, a company that helps men live more fulfilling lives by using simple yet effective tools. Together with his business partner they facilitate outdoor-based retreats for men seeking to reclaim their vitality and purpose.

During the episode we discuss: 

  • The cultural narrative around what it means to be a modern man. 
  • The power of men coming together in settings outside their homes. 
  • How they help men get the tools they need to shed their masks and really be seen. 
  • What it’s like representing men in wellness.
  • And the number one thing we can do to cultivate a society that supports men in a new way. 

 

Stay In Touch

The Vital Guide Website
The Vital Guide Instagram 
Michael’s Website 

Interested in becoming a Health Coach? Shoot me an email to hailey@hailey-miller.com to learn more. 

© 2017 Hailey Miller
Developed and Designed by Audrey Saccone | Photos by Caitee Smith Photography